Happy National Restless Legs Awareness Day!



I promise you, these legs (and the rear end they’re connected to) are not restless and will remain planted here, happily. Lappy browsing the web, warm boots on, bundled up, trying to ignore the football game my father is watching, and not too hungry – life is good.

I don’t think I’ve ever experienced the restless leg syndrome symptoms but I do have a similar sort of predicament to share. So I have this weird thing where I’m okay with dead bodies and lifeless blood (within reason) but seeing veins through someone’s skin or hearing heartbeats is seriously gross to me! In school PhysEd we had to monitor and record our heart rates and I would get so disgusted and stressed out through the process that I was told I was doing it wrong! No, my heart actually is racing like an 80 year old woman after a sprint because I cannot handle feeling and hearing my heart beat. Good job heart, keep on beating, but do it quietly!

Anyway, the point of this tangent is that when I lie down to go to sleep and everything is quiet I can hear and feel my heart beat. That should be the most peaceful time, just as you’re about to nod off to unconsciousness but it kills me and I have to move and rustle around as if shrug off the sound and start the peace process over. I’ve figured out that to beat my disgust of the cardiovascular system I have to count my heartbeats in rhythm, which actually, literally makes me want to die. By about number 15 my skin is crawling and I want to move so bad and I feel ultimately tormented but if I keep going I’ll eventually lose count with the monotony and fall asleep. I imagine that the restless leg deal is a little bit like that, that you just feel so uncomfortable and crawly that you have to move to ‘fix it’. Who knows, I could be totally off. But I do know, for a fact, that if we invent a silent, feel-less heart pump anytime soon I’ll be the first in line for it!



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